Essay by Barry Goldstein How would a typical family court analyze a case in which they believe a safe mother who is the primary attachment figure has failed to promote the relationship with a father the mother believes is dangerous and abusive? In many ways, this is the typical custody case the courts would call “high conflict,” and experts familiar with current scientific research would call … [Read more...]
Double Standard in DV Custody Cases Hurts Children – Three Custody Practices Incompatible with Fair Outcomes
Essay by Barry Goldstein The American Justice System is based on the belief that when each side is given the opportunity to make their best case, the court will reach a fair decision. The obvious problem is when parties have widely disparate financial resources, particularly when only one party can afford an attorney. Courts have sought to respond by providing attorneys for defendants facing … [Read more...]
The Importance of Treating Women Respectfully
Essay by Barry Goldstein I grew up in a sexist country as a typical sexist guy, not particularly more or less sexist than most boys and men. I benefited from my male privilege even while being oblivious to the unearned benefits it brought. I might have remained ignorant had I not agreed to serve on the board of a battered women’s shelter in Westchester County, New York. One of my best decisions … [Read more...]
Someone is Mentally Ill, an Addict, or an Abuser: The Vastly Different Response in Family Court and in Life
Essay by Barry Goldstein Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Studies are medical research from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. ACE tells us that exposure to trauma is far more harmful to children than previously understood and has lifelong consequences unless preventive responses are taken soon enough. There are ten ACEs. Having parents who are mentally ill or engage in substance … [Read more...]
Alienation Distraction Tactics
Essay by Barry Goldstein There is a pattern in most domestic violence custody cases that would help courts understand child custody disputes better and avoid mistakes that place children in jeopardy. In most cases, during the relationship the father wanted or demanded the mother provide most of the child care. In any other type of litigation, this pattern would be recognized as an admission by … [Read more...]